She tried before the bath with her wrists and flowers of redness dispersing through the wetness before her mom came home from work.
She tried with the silk clasping around her neck but no suitable knot.
She tried with a swim to an egg shaped rock off from a firmiliar beach, she dove deep but the water carried her up with no nigotiations.
She tried with the reds and blues in the basement and the writing above.

all failures
but is it because she didn't really want to or is it because she didn't have enough time before her mother's return, an army knot stored in her brain, weights attached to her feet and hands, or emotional stability?